Monday, 6 September 2010

The End of Two Eras

I am having a bittersweet day.  It's the first day back at school for my youngest and it looks like my school run days are over as she is now old enough to want to be independent and go with a friend.  I'm pleased she's organised this with a girl in her class but of course it means I no longer have those walks with her and that familiar structure to my day (I've been doing school runs for 12 years).  So I suppose I'm in mourning in a way.  The days of small children are past.

The other bittersweet thing is that I am knitting some baby things for a friend of mine and - sorry I can't remember if I've blogged this before - I've been getting really interested in vintage baby knitting patterns as a result.  They turn up in charity shops quite a bit and I am starting to view them from a new perspective.  Modern patterns tend to be rather dumbed down at times and can feel a bit half hearted in terms of being a bit cobbled together, I don't know if that makes sense.  Vintage ones from the forties and fifties are so beautiful and they seem more patterned and as if more care went into the little details.  I am feeling as if I'd like to knit from these patterns and maybe sell or give away to charity what I produce.  Anyway, to get to the bitter part, I visited my mum this morning and she had gathered together her old baby knitting patterns to give to me as she seems to have no intention of knitting baby things ever again.  This gives me a big pang of sadness as, when my girls were born she knitted some truly lovely cardigans and matinee coats which I used and used and treasured.  As the girls grew older I didn't part with them and, in fact, they are now under my side of the bed in my old baby changing bag but you can't see them in my picture (previous post) as they are tucked well under.  As I cycled away from my mum's I thought she looked old and tired and I wondered how long I would have her in my life.  She, too, is clearing out but not so that she can live in peace .......

So it's an emotional day with strong feelings and awareness of the passage of time and the end of two eras both at once.  I'm not keen on this time of the year, I prefer Spring into Summer.

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